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Mar. 12th, 2002 08:13 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gement"And if I could just remember these dreams, I'm sure they're trying to tell me... something. -- Laurie Anderson, Mr. Heartbreak.
Strange dreams. Something about going to private school (damn you, Harry Potter, for making that an option my mind could comprehend) and getting lost trying to get anywhere, and I could barely breathe. I'm so out of shape. I can't do a flight of stairs or even a brisk walk without getting winded anymore. My bloodwork says I'm just out of shape. (The last three sentences are real. I don't know why. But it showed up even worse in the dream.)
But it was even worse in gym class, which was a nightmarish parody of grade school, and we were supposed to be learning some basic ballet move in conjunction with dodgeball. The move was, to the best of my recollection of dance vocabulary, two sashays to the side. Just a ground-covering thing.
I hate dancing enough as it is, and when I tried to do it, the person beside me sympathetically grabbed my waist to support me and made me fall down. I was so furious I kicked off of the wall to break free of her and got hollered at by the teacher. But I got to try the stupid step without a me-sized weight around my waist.
Then, the worst part. I'd been lugging around a LOT of stuff while getting lost, up and down stairs, etc... no comments from the peanuts gallery on the symbolism of lugging around tons of stuff, thanks. At the end of gym, when we were packing away our sleeping bags (we'd been using them as body padding for dodgeball), they say, "Just leave those here in a pile." I was instantly convinced I would never see it again. When I asked why I couldn't keep it with me (even with all those stairs to face), the instructor said they were going to be stamped with the school's name and address, which felt like a screaming violation of property rights to me, and I cried more...
Compare to two entries ago. Hmm. Whether or not it lightens my load, I don't want this damned institution forcibly stamping its marks all over me.
---
Also, some flicker from earlier in the dream: my dad asking if he'd gotten me enough presents for occasions over the years (completely out of character, and in-dream, I could just recall that he'd gotten me a lot of media, books and movies, also completely out of character). My younger sister reading my very dog-eared and binding-split copy of the Vagina Monologues (which I don't own, and if I did own, all the dog-earing would be hers. She was 10 before we trained her not to leave books out in the rain).
I wouldn't write all this down, but it's the first time I've clearly remembered a dream in a while, so captured it is. This will probably be the last of my dream entries that's publically posted; I don't want to bore the rest of you with the 'and then I turned into a giant raisin and was eaten by smurfs' stuff. If you have an interest in reading future dream entries, let me know and I'll add you to the appropriate group.
Strange dreams. Something about going to private school (damn you, Harry Potter, for making that an option my mind could comprehend) and getting lost trying to get anywhere, and I could barely breathe. I'm so out of shape. I can't do a flight of stairs or even a brisk walk without getting winded anymore. My bloodwork says I'm just out of shape. (The last three sentences are real. I don't know why. But it showed up even worse in the dream.)
But it was even worse in gym class, which was a nightmarish parody of grade school, and we were supposed to be learning some basic ballet move in conjunction with dodgeball. The move was, to the best of my recollection of dance vocabulary, two sashays to the side. Just a ground-covering thing.
I hate dancing enough as it is, and when I tried to do it, the person beside me sympathetically grabbed my waist to support me and made me fall down. I was so furious I kicked off of the wall to break free of her and got hollered at by the teacher. But I got to try the stupid step without a me-sized weight around my waist.
Then, the worst part. I'd been lugging around a LOT of stuff while getting lost, up and down stairs, etc... no comments from the peanuts gallery on the symbolism of lugging around tons of stuff, thanks. At the end of gym, when we were packing away our sleeping bags (we'd been using them as body padding for dodgeball), they say, "Just leave those here in a pile." I was instantly convinced I would never see it again. When I asked why I couldn't keep it with me (even with all those stairs to face), the instructor said they were going to be stamped with the school's name and address, which felt like a screaming violation of property rights to me, and I cried more...
Compare to two entries ago. Hmm. Whether or not it lightens my load, I don't want this damned institution forcibly stamping its marks all over me.
---
Also, some flicker from earlier in the dream: my dad asking if he'd gotten me enough presents for occasions over the years (completely out of character, and in-dream, I could just recall that he'd gotten me a lot of media, books and movies, also completely out of character). My younger sister reading my very dog-eared and binding-split copy of the Vagina Monologues (which I don't own, and if I did own, all the dog-earing would be hers. She was 10 before we trained her not to leave books out in the rain).
I wouldn't write all this down, but it's the first time I've clearly remembered a dream in a while, so captured it is. This will probably be the last of my dream entries that's publically posted; I don't want to bore the rest of you with the 'and then I turned into a giant raisin and was eaten by smurfs' stuff. If you have an interest in reading future dream entries, let me know and I'll add you to the appropriate group.
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Date: 2002-03-13 12:57 pm (UTC)Love, the GF